I smoke tonight... I was so energized after I got off work and just did. No excuses. Tomorrow will be better.
I didn't even have a bad day. I had a great day. Why is it that I have no real issues quitting the first couple of days to three days then out of nowhere, it is a bite in the butt?
Tomorrow.
Over the years, I see we all really change for better or worse, in small ways, daily, and noticeable ways over longer periods of time, becoming more hardened or free. Maybe I can give my kids or even myself, encouragement in trusting that whatever good or bad we face, God will be the King of our daily morph... He can use it all to His glory...
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Day Two of Quit
Let me just start by saying I ate WAY too much candy last night. I do not "do" Halloween and very disappointed that my church gets involved in it, by doing Trunk or Treat. NEEDLESS to say, my husband brought home an amount of candy that should only be in a house that participates in these festivities. He didn't open the door and hand it out, (which I am thankful) so I asked for what purpose other that gorging did he get all of it. Apparently he wanted to bring it to work for the guys to have at it. Well, the thing about quitting smoking is you want to snack, and your sugar levels go a little low your first couple of days, so I started snacking (also to keep down any anger or irrational mood-swing-spells which happen when you confront the cigarette junky within----it's funny though, that he can be tamed with a ridiculous amount of candy, lol. Nerds (my personal favorite), Tootsie Roll Pops, Fun Size Snickers, the big mints that disintegrate in your mouth they moment they hit your spit (another fave), etc.
I probably didn't go to sleep last night at all. I probably crashed out from the overdosing and inevitable drop in sugar levels... ha ha... thank goodness I am not diabetic (nor do I intend to continue to treat my body this way--but I play All's Fair in the Quit--- after I am not a lunatic form withdrawals I will incorporate my whole food regimen back in..)
Thursday I go to the Allergy Specialist. He ran blood tests to tell me for sure all that I am allergic to. I know I went in March to a homeopathic doctor, but I want a followup with a specialist to confirm, as these diet changes are so drastic and expensive, and I am not sure what is causing the sinus cavity to be draining and inflamed all the time... another reason I am no longer a smoker. We don't have money to waste with unnecessary diet changes and cigarettes.
Day 2 has gone very well. Dull headache, but that could be due to the fact that I have not drank caffeine since I smoked Sunday. Can't tell. Regardless, I don't ever drink caffeine unless I am smoking... so I guess I am doing two things at once either way =) I am off today and have no plans... probably be lazy. I am not expecting much from myself until I am sure I won't bite people's heads off... and it is my decision to quit, not my husband's (who is still smoking)... I can do this... and I can do it without getting into ANY stressful chats with him about why is he won't quit. I have to do it first. Show him that I can keep up with it... then start gently nudging him as well. Lord, please lead me.
I probably didn't go to sleep last night at all. I probably crashed out from the overdosing and inevitable drop in sugar levels... ha ha... thank goodness I am not diabetic (nor do I intend to continue to treat my body this way--but I play All's Fair in the Quit--- after I am not a lunatic form withdrawals I will incorporate my whole food regimen back in..)
Thursday I go to the Allergy Specialist. He ran blood tests to tell me for sure all that I am allergic to. I know I went in March to a homeopathic doctor, but I want a followup with a specialist to confirm, as these diet changes are so drastic and expensive, and I am not sure what is causing the sinus cavity to be draining and inflamed all the time... another reason I am no longer a smoker. We don't have money to waste with unnecessary diet changes and cigarettes.
Day 2 has gone very well. Dull headache, but that could be due to the fact that I have not drank caffeine since I smoked Sunday. Can't tell. Regardless, I don't ever drink caffeine unless I am smoking... so I guess I am doing two things at once either way =) I am off today and have no plans... probably be lazy. I am not expecting much from myself until I am sure I won't bite people's heads off... and it is my decision to quit, not my husband's (who is still smoking)... I can do this... and I can do it without getting into ANY stressful chats with him about why is he won't quit. I have to do it first. Show him that I can keep up with it... then start gently nudging him as well. Lord, please lead me.
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